Is it bad when you dream of going to sleep and never waking up?
I feel like that sometimes. I want to just got to sleep and forget all of my problems, have them go away. I don't want them, and I don't need them.
Every single day seems like a struggle to live. Sometimes I don't notice it, sometimes I do, like a heavy weight on my head. Some days life seems pointless, like if it has no meaning, each and every day is pointless, just time passing, me getting older, wishing to fall asleep forever.
As I write this, tears are drying on my cheek, my eyes are sticky.
I forgot my fucking final. This just set me off into a damned scene. I threw a fucking bitch-fit, then I started getting sad and depressed. I started ripping paper, random paper from my notebook. There's a little pile of ripped paper in the trashcan.
I still need to study, but I truly do not see the point in it all. My mom, cares, she fucking loves me. But I'm such a damned asshole to her, I don't know how she puts up with me. If I were her, I sure ass hell wouldn't.
There's ripped paper near my feet. What does this mean?
I look forward to tomorrow and i get this feeling in my stomach, and tears in my eyes.
What's wrong with me? Please, can anyone tell me?
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Yes... I suppose it is bad when you dream of going to sleep and never waking up. :( I've had that dream so many times before myself and it sucks. It'd be great if we never had any problems, but perhaps that's what makes life such a challenge. Don't give into them because it's far too easy. You've got to fight. You must be a little bit of a fighter. Especially your battle against 'Twatlight' ;)
ReplyDeleteI guess some days of existence are pointless. None of us know why we're on this planet or what our job is to be here. You've just got to enjoy the things that you have and make the most of it. I know that's easier said than done, but you'll be surprised what you can achieve if you think positive and smile.
Awww. :( Now I feel sad because you were crying. Seeing and knowing people are upset really hurts, but I think that you're strong enough to pull through all the shit you get in your life. Things fall into place eventually and you'll know where you stand. Just give things time. :)
You've got to be able to study for yourself as well as your mum. A little motivation might get you back on track. You want to be an author right? If you study hard and do well for yourself then you've got a better chance of being that. Kick Stephanie Meyers ass. ;)
There's nothing wrong with you. Honestly. I think we all get like this sometimes. Shit happens, but it passes. :)
This is all I can say to you and it probably sucks, but at least I tried. I hope you're feeling better soon anyway.
I feel like this loads. The only reason I haven't killed myself yet is probably because I know it would upset my mother beyond belief. I'm not sure why though, I nebver feel like I'm good enough to be her daughter.
ReplyDeleteAt least you're taking it out on paper and not your skin.
Sorry, this wasn't very uplifting, I'm in a bad mood. It will get better, I promise You just have to hang on. Sometime the world seems a horrible place but there is goodness, you just have to look out for it. If you weren't here you'd never see it.
hey man, life sucks sometimes...i know.
ReplyDeleteits not bad to feel that way because sometimes all we truly need is an escape. A temporary escape that helps escape want conflicts us today and confronts us tomorrow.
its ok dream, fuck the problems, the tears(its okay to cry, its actually beautiful u can admit that)...
just cry today cause times suck, but tomorrow ur gonna be a stuggling writer and ur gonna love every second, every second of it cause ur writing about wat u love...ahha ur writing about me...;D
ur r a great person and id rather u tear all the trees apart on this earth before u hurt urself... cause who else is gonna be my tranny fag that is the reason i can go on my cougar escapades!
bitch i luv ya! ahha and so does ur motha and thats why she puts up with ur crap...ahha and y i do and y everyone else does...
u've done good kid and u will do good...
lol next time u get sad just think of ur boyfriend Jeffrey Star and u two making out...:D
ahha from porno flick bitches that love Ochoa!
peace out homie!
Lol "just think of ur boyfriend Jeffrey Star and u two making out." See, that's life. It's fun really. ;)
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